Ross Kemp - not Grant - ed!
I went to lunch with Ross Kemp this week. Well I guess I
should clarify that: me and fifty or so others went to lunch with RK. Check me
out! Sarah, (who is my long suffering friend who does all the clever internet
stuff, which I am totally incapable of doing), joined me and we met and listened
to Ross wax lyrical about what he’s been up to, (see I am on first name terms
now..)
I do have to say that I was a little terrified I would
call him Grant, (Mitchell from East Enders fame), and so I started to repeat a
Ross Ross Ross mantra in my head, hoping that the words would stick. Oh the
shame if I called him Grant, or even worse Phil...
I don’t know what I expected. He is made out to be a bit
of a hard man, perhaps he would lunge at us and shout “’Ave it, you scum!”
whilst brandishing a sawn off shotgun, looking menacing with a fierce and
slightly mad glint in his eye. Actually, dispelling all the myths, in reality,
he is quite charming, shorter that I thought he would be, but dressed in the
required dark suit shirt and tie combo. He appeared relaxed and conversed easily
as he made his way around the tables.
On our table we had a young lady who had travelled all
the way from Blackburn for this lunch, and then decided that she couldn’t eat anything
as she was so star struck! She even had Ross Kemps’ initials tattooed on her
arm. I have to say that I found this a bit disturbing, but felt her efforts
should not go unnoticed and so as he reached our table I told him about her.
After hearing this he whipped out his mobile phone and started to press
buttons. I was a bit miffed and suggested that maybe this wasn’t the time to be
texting or tweeting but he actually wanted to share a photo with me. It was a
photo of a man’s leg with a tattoo of Ross Kemps face on it. I actually thought
that it was quite a good likeness but in a creepy sort of way: 1. because who
would have a tattoo of a total strangers face put on their body? & 2. Why has
Ross Kemp kept it on his phone? and in that moment I realised that there was
indeed, ‘Nowt as strange as folk!’
I frowned as I showed Sarah, “Ooh that’s a bit odd, don’t
you think?”she said I nodded, I mean, come on - sorry Ross, because you seem a
very nice man and all that, but, personally I wouldn’t want your face staring
up at me from the back of my calf until the end of days, no offence of course...
I told him my about my Ash serving with the Army in
Afghanistan last year, and he showed me a photo of his little boy, who is
gorgeous. We were, in that moment, both extremely proud parents of boys, and it
was nice and convivial. Ross Kemp was very... well... ordinary... normal, dare
I say it...even soft...
After dinner he spoke about the horrors he has seen. He
wasn’t dramatic, just very matter of fact, which I actually felt a little sad
about...perhaps he has seen too much death, pain destruction in Afghanistan, Chile, Pakistan,
Mexico, Glasgow and all of the other places he had reported from; perhaps he is
now desensitised? I recently watched his programme Invisible Wounds about
troops with PTSD from the 1982 Falklands war and more recently Afghanistan - he
clearly was moved, connected and concerned about the potential time bomb we
have with this rarely talked about issue. But it was when he talked about the
devastation of the rain forests, about what he saw happening to the Amazon, the
lungs of the world, he became animated, alive, his blue eyes shone. He claims
that he is no environmentalist, but you know I think deep down he cares, really
cares...
After the lunch was over I asked him if he would support
our project called Herrick Wood. A project to create woodland, to support, protect
and encourage the lungs of our country and in doing this
support the troops returning from Afghanistan and their families who suffer the
on- going and future psychological effects of war. And you know what? Ross Kemp
gently put his hands on my shoulders and looked at me...
Move over Grant Mitchell...I think the real Ross Kemp has
just stood up...
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